Sometimes I am worried that I am ruining Rob and Heather’s marriage. I know I am giving myself a lot of power here since I am really only on the outside of things but it does not stop me from worrying about it. Things are hard for them because of a lot of stuff going on in our lives and I am the least of those troubles, I guess I just feel like I add stress where it does not need to be added.
I’m sad I can feel it creeping up on me trying to nibble its way into my brain. I am trying so hard to not worry about it and just be happy with all the good stuff that is going on but it’s hard. I should not be sad I have a lot, a nice place to live, good friends that I feel like I’m connecting with again and a man who loves me very much. I guess the problems that Rob and Heather are having are effecting me to. Rob seems so down, he is taking all of this so hard I wish I could help him but I can’t. This lifestyle can be hard in more ways then I though of when I started this, I hope things will start to look up. I plan on watching a great and sexy movie tonight and I know that will help to bring my spirits up.
