Forgetting

I have never wanted anything more in my life then to be pregnant again, it's making me nuts. Rob and I talked about waiting 4 or 5 months before we started to try again and I just don't know if I can wait that long.  I have tried to explain to him how I feel and I just don't thing I am getting it across to him. I feel like I need to get past this part I need to get pregnant and get past the 11 week mark to feel safe.  Until I do I am just going to worry myself into a tizzy, thinking that I can't do it.  Before all this I read an artical once that talked about women wanting to have a baby right away after having a miscarriage and I could not understand it at the time. I would think "Why do that want to do that won't it be to hard so soon, or maybe they should give them self some time." But now I finally understand you have to its not about replacing the baby you lost its about feeling like your not a failure, that you can have a healthy and happy baby safely.

I am so scared about all of this, I feel like it never happened all of it the pregnancy and the lose. It's so frightening, I don't want to forget.