Future

I have been thinking about my future a lot lately, less about the good and bad and more about what is going to happen. I wonder where will I be in 10 years, I'm 25 now that will put me at 35 years old. Will I be married again, have children, and be living in the same state? I hope that I have kids by then I always really wanted to have kids while I was young so I could enjoy my youth with them. As for being married I guess I really hope that I am with somebody, I would hate to be all alone at 35 years old. I want someone to hold my hand when I walk in the park, to tease me while we sit on the couch at night. I want to sit with him as I watch our child play in the park, see his face full of pride as our son or daughter draws their first picture or rolls their first die (sorry gamer reference).

I mainly just want to be happy, I know that not everything will be perfect, life is never perfect but happy is still doable. My life has taken tons of turns in the last couple of months and not all of them in the directions I would have thought but I really think its going to go well. I have a lot of hope as of late and I am trying not to let my silly girlyness get in the way.

The thing that is making me the happiest is that I am really starting to feel good about myself. As a teen I always looked at my self and said I was too large or fat. Now I realize I was really thin back then I was just larger in my frame and height then most of the girls in my school. Now I am chubby but people in my life have helped me come to look at myself as beautiful even sexy. I would love to be thinner for my health and well being but it's not something I look at as being the end of the world any more.

I really think my life is going to be happy and that I am going to be surrounded by people who love me. I know I still have a lot of bumps in the road to get through before that happens but things really seem to be going in the direction of a great deal of happiness.