Hold Me

I never knew how much the words "Hold Me" could mean to me. When you’re going through a divorce you’re losing something, someone you put a lot of your life and soul into. It hurts a lot, even if your feelings for this person or this life are different no longer as strong. I'm finally letting go and I never realized how hard and how sad I would be. I thought I was done I thought I did not care but I was really so very wrong. You never stop caring about the people you loved it just can't work that way too much of your self is still with them. As much as this hurts I know I needed to feel this way, its part of me moving on.

The hardest part for me is the longing to be held, to feel someone holding you in their arms knowing that they love you. At night I lay alone my arms wrapped around a pillow and sometimes the loneliness is too much for me. I wonder around my sister’s apartment watching crappy videos on You tube or looking at her many books. Then I try to lie down again and not think of how much I miss the warmth of someone I love beside me. I try not to let it get to me but I'm so sad and I feel so alone, I know it's my fault but I can't help it. So many people are here for me loving me but at night when I'm finally alone all I long for is to say those much used for words "Hold Me" and have someone do it.