Scream

I'm so tired I really just don't want to deal with this stuff anymore. I love the life I have chosen but I just want it to be alright right now, this very moment. I am sick of being sad, angry, lonely, and sorry because I am all of those things and it feels like it's killing me sometimes. It's tearing me up making me wonder what is really right, I'm so happy at times so very happy but at others I fell like I could just cry forever.

I hate this emo crap, I'm not like this I'm strong, nice, happy I don't get this sad, so very sad that I.... god what the fuck am I saying. I don't want to be here, I don't want to hide every move I make every emotion, I want to scream, rip and just ball my eyeballs out. Why can't this be easy why can't I just take the easy road why does it always have to be the hard way Chandra, are you just dumb? Who is this person, I'm so not her but I feel like this and I can't seem to stop it.

I am so gloriously happy with the my heart just out there I just don't want it to be snatched away told to get over it find something new I can't do this I just can't.

Please don't hurt me, I can't fit on this page how much I don't want to lose this. Please who ever is there whatever is there don't let this hurt me and the people I love.